continued attempts not to look like a jackass
Becks is stumped about finding sandals that are comfortable. I sympathize, but my needs are humbler*: I'd just like some that leave me my dignity.
Men have no good sandal options. Flip-flops? Frat boy. Tevas? Hippie. Birkenstocks? California hippie. I like wearing all of these, but short of the classic Roman centurion sandal, it'd be hard to call any open-air male footwear respectable. And even if this last option was available, you'd still need to be sporting a cloak and crested helmet to really complete the look. That's just not practical for the beach.
The only solution may be surrender — that's right, the old man sandals-over-black-socks technique. I used to think it was an early sign of dementia, but now I'm beginning to wonder if it isn't just a big fuck you to fashion norms.
* Probably because, as a member of the podiatric patriarchy, there's no onus on me to wear shoes that are really really uncomfortable.
