Also, it quenches your thirst really quickly: the carbonation pushes the water out of your stomach and into your small intestine, where it can be more rapidly absorbed (this is also why champagne gets you drunk faster than wine does).

Such a geek. Doesn't the carbonation also have a dehydrating effect?

The real questions are, can you make tonic water, and can you use it to carbonate alcoholic drinks without the addition of soda water? Like, a fizzy manhattan or some such, but not a long drink? That would be "trippy".

I've heard people talk about a dehydrating effect, but I've never heard an explanation. Alcohol and caffeine are both diuretics, so that makes sense. I suspect that people just get confused and assume that carbonation is somehow dehydrating. Maybe there's some other mechanism of action, but so far as I know it doesn't do anything. Maaaybe it increases the pressure on the CO2-clearing systems in your body. I sort of doubt it.

As for tonic water: the fine people at Soda Club do indeed make a tonic syrup. I don't know about carbonating other things, though. The instruction manual seems to think it's a very, very bad idea to try to carbonate anything except water. I think this is probably because the CO2 doesn't dissolve into the water as effectively when there's already something in solution (this is also why it stresses that the water should be cold, I believe). But I'm sort of hoping that there's a much more entertaining reason for it not wanting you to.

Either way, I feel pretty confident that we'll try to carbonate something ill-advised eventually. I'll report back, if I still can.

I can't imagine CO2 would have any dehydrating effect - it'd just dissolve into your bloodstream and be cleared through the lungs. So while you're borderline psychotic for enjoying the *taste* of seltzer water, the hydration effects are legit. Though I should remind you that you sit at a computer for a living, so I can't imagine you have particularly demanding hydration needs.

Anyhow, you should carbonate gasoline. It will make your car go faster. Like speed holes.

Jeff, don't be ridiculous. To achieve a speedhole-like effect I'd clearly need to saturate the gasoline with some oxygen-contributing molecule.

(This is my way of asking for suggestions.)

Doesn't MTBE do something like that? You should try to buy MTBE over the internet. I bet they won't (a) actually sell it to you or (b) leave it next to your stoop (lest it pollute the groundwater).

Come to the think of it, I'm not sure exactly what MTBE does, and Wikipedia's all the way over there...

Postscriptum: your explanation of the The Great Lee Family Seltzer Water Conspiracy is somewhat more convincing than Beth's ("it's just really good when you're hungover"). But consider me a skeptic nonetheless.

i have to tell you, the lee seltzer conspiracy has worked on me as well. i never drank the stuff before i met tommy. but when i was home this weekend, i used the soda club approximately 327 times. seltzer. yum.

Perhaps the powers of delusion work more strongly in a committed romantic relationship. As merely a good friend to Beth, I remain immune to the brainwashing that would have me downing that bubbly rubbish. I pray for all of you.

Actually, if Tom's right about the hydration effects of soda water, that would make Beth right about its value when you're hungover.

Ben, I appreciate your intellectual curiosity, but please don't encourage Beth. There's already too much seltzer water in our fridge. It gets in the way of cheese, beer, and salsa.

I'm just saying, if you're hungover, becoming hydrated quickly would be a good thing.

But I can't get hungover, since there's no room for beer with all this damn seltzer water.

ray, that's why you need soda club. you can refill just a couple of bottles as many times as you want. no more seltzer fridge clutter! and you (or beth, rather) will save literally dozens of cents!

Hm, interesting point. Beth: buy this thing. We can employ it in our other super-top-secret-way-too-classified-to-be-discussed-here carbonization project.

As an engineer and former chemist, this talk about carbonation is the equivalent to scratching a chalkboard... it send shivers up my spine.
You all need to get the following straight:
1) When CO2 is pumped into water it actually chemically reacts with the water (H2O) to form carbonic acid (H2CO3). The bonds holding this together are rather weak. Energy induced upon the carbonic acid will break the molecule apart back to it's component form... H20 + CO2 H2CO3. This energy can come in the form of heat and/or friction force between the molecules (think agitation).
2) It is easier to force CO2 into cold water since the kinetic energy of the H2O molecules is less than that of warm water. In cold water, the water molecules are moving much slower than at room temperature (think entropy of ice versus steam). This allows the carbonic acid to achieve equilibrium easily in solution. It is also the reason that soda water will get flat if you leave it out for a while... the CO2 breaks down in the carbonic acid and is liberated since there is insufficient external pressure to keep it in the water.
3) Soda water has been around for a few centuries. It used to be used for medicinal purposes because of its acidic content (mostly for digestive purposes). For example, highly carbonated ginger ale is recommended after a bout of vomiting and coke is often used for mild stomach problems in children (and what do you think is the key component of Alka Seltzer). However, most of the CO2 is liberated before it even reaches your stomach (think of the tingling on your tongue and throat). Humans tend to burp this excess CO2 buildup. Now, I'm not a doctor so I can't expound on the absorption of CO2 in the blood or intestine. But, I do know that feeding Alka Seltzer to pigeons leads to explosive effects!
4) EXPERIMENT: For those with litmus paper and a personal carbonation system, try testing the acidity of the seltzer water under different temperatures. From the chemistry I have described, you should notice that fresh, cold seltzer water is more acidic than room temperature seltzer water. OPTION: Pour clean water into a clean cup. Record its PH with litmus paper. Leave the cup of water exposed to air for at least a week. Record its PH with litmus paper again. You'll notice that the water has turned acidic on its own. Why? You'll have ask or figure it out (HINT: H2O + CO2 H2CO3).

PS: The virtue of being single... 3 types of beer (Guiness, Sam Adams, Harpoon) and 2 types of soda water (Perrier and Poland Spring) with varying levels of carbonation. No lady is going to tell me what I can or cannot keep in my fridge. hahaha!

Tomas, please don't be an ass. Jeff is a year away from a PhD in chemical engineering at Berkeley. I *think* he may know what he's talking about. Speaking of which -- find for me anything that we said that doesn't reflect the knowledge you just dropped. I am well aware of the existence of carbonic acid.

As for your question about what I think the active ingredient in Alka Seltzer is: I think it's aspirin and sodium bicarbonate. And hey, wikipedia thinks so, too! It has nothing to do with carbonic acid (how is a weak acid supposed to function as an antacid, anyway?).

And not to pile on, but you're wrong about the pigeon thing, too.

Tom, I wasn't trying to be an ass. I thought real information would benefit the discussion. Apparently I have to delineate all the logical arguments (the site doesn't allow me to use anything with the less than/greater than sign to create ASCII arrows).
1) MY ARGUMNET: If water and CO2 mix, then carbonic acid is formed. CO2 that is undissolved in the liquid escapes as gas. When the carbonic acid reaches your digestive system it is absorbed by the body. There is no hydrating aspect to this (hydration implies water). In fact, if you look up the wiki for carbonic acid it says "the equilibrium between carbon dioxide and carbonic acid is very important for controlling the acidity of body fluids." This implies that carbonation helps balance out the pH of your body. It is recommend to drink plain old water during a night of heavy drinking because it helps dilute the effects of alcohol consumption while rehydrating your body. If you examine the consumption of seltzer water, you are getting the majority of the benefit from the water and not the carbonation. This is what my whole spiel was about: SELTZER DOESN'T PROVIDE ANY MORE BENEFITS THAN PLAIN WATER. The antiquated practice of using seltzer for cures is pointless.
2) Not everything you read on the Internet is true. Also if you are going to quote wikipedia, at least read the article: "As the tablets dissolve, the acid and bicarbonate react vigorously producing carbon dioxide gas (hence the "Seltzer"), which also produces enough agitation to allow the active ingredients to dissolve readily. The resulting solution is then drunk by the patient." Am I the only one who sees "producing carbon dioxide in water" in this statement. The act of producing carbon dioxide in water creates carbonic acid. If you want the Internets version, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carbonic_acid
3) Your link to the seagulls did not prove/disprove that alka seltzer makes pigeons explode. Everybody was contradicting each other. To prove/disprove it, just feed a pigeon alka selzter. Although that would be cruel.

PS: Your statement that only PhD candidates know best is rather disingenuous. I constantly deal with PhD staff at work and some of them aren't the brightest bulbs in the drawer (jeff, I'm speaking in general terms and not at you, ok).

I'm a little confused. I thought Tommy's statement was that the increased pressure in your stomach due to carbonated water forces water through the gut lining faster. I have no idea if this is true or not, but it sounds reasonable.

The wiki quote that "the equilibrium between carbon dioxide and carbonic acid is very important for controlling the acidity of body fluids." is true, but this means the body tells whether or not its getting enough oxygen by "measuring" blood pH. Not breathing leads to buildup of CO2 leading to buildup of H2CO3 leading to body pH going down. But exhaling re-establishes the blood's equilibrium with the atmosphere - and since CO2 is in the air at very low concentrations, essentially all of the CO2 in your blood is released. This is why you feel slight relief if you exhale after holding your breath, even though you still haven't filled your lungs with oxygen.

So, I guess my point is that the chemistry of drinking "acid" isn't what's on the table here - it was about stomach pressure. In fact, drinking acid is just like drinking anything else; it just tastes different.

1) As Jeff mentioned, it's about the pressure. the specific strength of co2 as an acid is important for your body, of course. But it's not what I was talking about. And as Jeff mentioned, it's fairly irrelevant -- respiration clears co2 from your body so efficiently that the amount you injest is unlikely to do anything.

I'm just not sure what misconceptions you were trying to correct in your original comment. All the information you shared was either incorrect or didn't contradict what I had said. Perhaps I misread your intent, but the "nails down a chalkboard" line certainly made it sound like you were trying to correct my ignorance.

2) that quote is referring to the physical action produced by the alka-seltzer releasing gas -- that mixes the active ingredients. it's specifically saying that the co2 is NOT the active ingredient -- it just helps mix the solution up. co2's chemistry has nothing to do with how alka-seltzer works in your body.

3) yeah, some dopes at the end of that thread contradicted the others. but the links to genuine sites all said that it's a myth. and alka-seltzer released a letter on the subject -- presumably they'd actually make sure it's true prior to publishing it.

what