the baby panda is also very hot right now
posted by tom / August 11, 2005 / 
In recent days it has come to our attention that many are experiencing increasing difficulty when trying to distinguish between the newborn baby panda and Owen Wilson. In order to resolve any potential confusion, we present this handy chart. It should serve both to help you identify the subtle distinctions between the two, and to spot possible "trouble areas" that may cause confusion. Feel free to print it out and keep a copy in your wallet for quick reference.
| Baby Panda | Owen Wilson | |
|---|---|---|
 | ||
| Dairy-Related Appellation | Butterstick | Butterscotch |
| ||
| Girls' Opinion Of | Highly Favorable | Highly Favorable |
| ||
| Nose | Stupid Looking | Stupid Looking |
| ||
| Anal Regimen | Mother engages in prolonged licking sessions to stimulate waste elimination | Engages in prolonged licking sessions (motivation unknown) |
Comments
No more will I insinuate that Owen Wilson's mother barks and poops when she's excited, nor will I accuse the baby panda of playing the same character in every movie. Thanks for breaking the issues down and saving me from a world of future embarassment.
So Owen is rehearsing for a remake of 'Muppets Take Manhattan'?
(For those who didn't watch it rerun on Encore all last month: "Tossed salad! TOSSSED SALAAAD!")
That's Butterscotch Stallion, pal. Anyway, Butterstick is totally wired and Wilson is tired.
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