you know what's truly atrocious in this country? it's not our incompetent administration, not the skyrocketing poverty levels, not the ever-worsening environmental standards. it's the train service. the fucking train service.

i started thinking about this yesterday while i was planning my extended weekend trip to nyc and boston. you see, i have some very dear friends from italy in those two places - the lovely natania, who's studying education at bank street at columbia in nyc, and carla, cynthia, and claire in boston, who are, respectively, teaching, doing marketing, and studying landscape architecture at harvard. and i haven't seen many of them in over a year. so we were well past due for some sort of reunione.

at first i was just going to fly in and out of boston, but then i realized i had enough time to take of a couple of days and visit natania in new york. literally, the only times i've ever been to nyc were to see radiohead concerts, so i haven't seen anything, really, of the city, except i'm very well acquainted with radio city music hall. i figured i could leave thursday evening, spend friday evening wandering around the city, and natania and i could train it up to boston friday night, ensuring a weekend full of wine, debauchery, and canoli.

except when i checked on prices on amtrak.com to go to nyc and/or boston, and found out that I CANNOT GET A ROUNDTRIP TICKET FOR UNDER $300 THAT DOESN'T TAKE 143 HOURS!!!

i have to admit that i've been completely spoiled by the train system in italy, which is absolutely amazing. contrary to what you might have heard about italian efficiency and organization, the trains are almost always on time, are pleasant and clean even in 2nd class, and also, you're traipsing about the italian countryside, so it's usually a pretty beautiful ride. now, i know nothing about any sort of government regulations that might be hindering awesome train service in america (or at least regionalized train service, especially up and down the east coast), but if the freaking italians can do it, we should be able to.

an example: from washington, d.c. to new york city, it's about 200 miles. this is comparable to the distance between the southern cities of naples and bari. on amtrak, a one-way second class ticket with an unreserved seat will run you $74 and takes about three hours. a ticket from naples to bari does take a bit longer, but you can purchase a 3 1/2 hour 2nd class ticket for $33.

now, from d.c. to boston, i think the distance is about 450 miles. an amtrak ticket between the two cities gose for $90 in its cheapest incarnation, and it'll take you almost 8 hours to get there. the distance is equivalent to the mileage between trieste and rome, can get there in a little over 7 hours, and costs only $57.

obviously, the fact that amtrak sucks and is expensive isn't really news to anyone, but after living in a country where i was able to hop on a train at a moment's notice and hit up city after wonderful city every weekend -- well. it's disappointing.

but i've found a semi-answer to my transportation woes: the ghetto chinatown buses, which are going to have to be my italian train substitute for now. i can get up to nyc for $15, then from nyc to boston for another $15, which isn't bad at all. of course, i'll be watching fantastic vistas like the new jersey turnpike and endless miles of medians instead of rolling tuscan hills or the jagged cliffs of the riviera, but it's a small price to pay to see le mie amiche belle.