fatigue
anybody checking the blog out lately will notice that it's kind of gone downhill, at least from my side. i'm either posting barely-formed rants that essentially equal "fuck george bush" or linking half-heartedly to other random sites.
in my defense, though, i've got a lot of stuff going on. and i'm tired all the time. obviously i'm phsyically tired from marathon training and running 30+ miles a week; and i'm starting to get stressed out about the whole raising $2,000 thing. turns out fundraising is kind of this huge all-consuming second job that involves planning large events, soliciting vendors, sending out mass mailings and leaving all your pride at the door. of course, i brought this on myself and need to stop bitching about it, but it's still something to deal with.
then i've got a few random other things going on. i'm thinking a lot lately, as most people my age are, about what the hell i'm going to do in the future. this summer is probably going to contain a lot of rather important decisions. do i want to go to grad school? if so, what exactly do i want to study? and where do i want to go? can i actually get in anywhere? who the hell would write me recommendations? and, dear god, please help me not fail the math part of the GREs, okay? additionally, if i do decide to go to grad school, that means i have to reconcile myself with probably staying at this job another year, which isn't a prospect i'm exactly thrilled with and is mentally tiring all in itself.
but if i choose not to go to grad school, that means i have to rachet up the job search, which is something that i only succeeded at last year because i was unemployed upon returning from italy and could spend 24/7 sending out resumes, going to interviews and harassing prospective employers. how in the world can i find a new job now when the only computer i have access to is the one at my current position? i can't exactly spend all of my 9-5 time cleaning up writing samples and browsing monster.com.
add to the mix that tommy, charles and i have to start a search for a new house in the d.c. or clarendon area and find a place that we like by september 1st, and, well, i'm on the verge of needing a few stiff drinks.
then there's all the political turmoil in the real world, and the ranting and raving about it from both sides in the blogosphere, and i somehow get tired just from the act of reading the blogs i normally enjoy. i just feel all this hatred and anger like, springing out from the computer monitor and latching itself onto my face from all over the place and it is just exhausting. i would try to implement a world-wide policy of puppies and alcohol but, you know, i don't think it would take.
naturally, none of this is really that big a deal compared to, well, anything. i have the basics: health, great friends and a wonderful family, love, a salary that allows me very occasionally to buy pretty shoes. so yes, i am a weiner-head to complain, but it still doesn't fix the fact that i barely have enough brain cells left to write coherent blog posts and/or do anything besides slump in front of the tv at the end of the day and watch "extreme home makeover." so i suppose i'll write when i can think of something intelligent to say. i know, that hasn't ever been a prerequisite for me when posting to the blog, but i'm trying it out for now.
meanwhile, i highly suggest you check out these albums i squandered money on over the weekend: carl newman's "slow wonder" (solo album from lead singer of the new pornographers), "hearts of oak" by ted leo and the pharmacists (yes, i'm slow to the game on this one, but i LOVE this album, and they're playing the black cat in july and fort reno at some point and we must go), and "bastards of the beat" by the damnwells (who are playing iota july 8 and we also must go). enjoy!
Comments
Creating a life plan is always stressful. The 5-year-plan question is always one of my least favorite in interviews or conversation because I have no answer.
The basics never seem to be enough. There is so much to compete with. I recently attended my sister's high school graduation and one of the graduates gave a speech about wanting only what one needs. He told a story about visiting a village in India maybe??? when he was in 6th grade and interviewing the people with his classmates. One girl asked what an old woman wanted and she replied, "Only what I need." The children pressed on with quesitons about a big house and various things, but the old woman was resolute about only wanting what she needed. The graduate was so impressed by that experience and carries it with him to this day.
This graduate is going to a Buddist camp abroad for a year before he goes to Yale, which helps to explain much of his viewpoint. As I was listening to his speech, all I could think of was how it probably went right over all the graduate's heads. This is a school where kids drive Jaguars. (Yes, a kid my sister knows has is OWN Jaguar, not a car of his parent's that he drives sometimes.) So the speech was nice and thoughful, but in the end will probably not change the perspective of any of his classmates.
After the graduation, my dad asked my brother what he needed and he said, "Dad I really NEED a better ($1000) paintball gun." So obviously the speech didn't make a mark on him. But the comment was funny. We still have to live in this world of competing interests, get ahead, and make a mark. So your point about the basics rings true with me.
Why can't you, Tommy, and Charles live in their current house? Do you just want to be closer to the city for your commutes? It might be hard to find a place that knows their availability that far out.
Good luck with marathon training and fundrasing. I'm sure it will be very satisfying when you cross the finish line. We're rooting for you!
if it were the three of us in their current house, the rent increase would be $200 for me, and i can't afford that. i'd also like to be somewhere closer to clarendon/some sort of nightlife scene, etc. and somewhere within walking distance of a metro.
I don't think you really need me to tell you that I'm all in favor of you moving to DC, but, you know, I'm all in favor of you moving to DC. I'm objectively pro-you kids being in the neighborhood. Keeping my eyes peeled.
As the consummate realist, I feel the need to point out that Clarendon will almost definitely be [much] more expensive than the suburbs of Arlington.
On the D.C. side, if you want a car in D.C. (registered, so then you can legally park on the street), you pay a tax of some % of the FMV of the car upon registration. Also, there's that new D.C. law banning driving and talking on non-handsfree phones, but I'm all for that.And don't even get me started on Maryland . . .true it will be more expensive, but since we're three people looking for a two bedroom, hopefully the fact that we're splitting it will make it pretty affordable. plus i'm willing to pay a little bit more to be able to commute more easily to work and have some semblance of a weeknight social life.
Has the DC hands-free law taken effect?
If you guys get a 2-br apt in Clarendon, you'll probaby also have to pay extra for parking and I doubt they would let you park 3 cars.
also true, but i think we're more interested in finding a house. and if we were to move to d.c. i might get rid of my car.
Actually, if your car has ever been registered in your name in another state, you don't have to pay that tax to register your vehicle in DC. So because I had a Texas title in my name, I paid zero taxes on my car.
As for parking, definitely depends on where you live. In my neighborhood in DC, there is so much ample street parking, that I get angry when I have to walk more than 5 car lengths to my front door. Same for Kriston's neighborhood. If you live anywhere near Dupont or Adam's, though, forget about it.
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